While you were sleeping

He is sleeping soundly now. After two rounds of rice meals for lunch, a movie and some play time, he finally agreed to take a nap.

My little boy. In a few years, he won’t be little anymore.

I have an hour before i start the preparations for dinner. It has been a week since the new school year started and the three of us have been slowly adjusting to our new routine.

There has been so many changes. I knew they were coming but i didn’t realize that my heart was not ready for them. It was just too much. All at the same time.

A new school for our eldest. Hiring a school bus for her after ten years of driving and picking her up from school. Having a teenager in the house and seeing how she is growing so fast everyday. Becoming more and more independent. Spreading her wings as my husband sadly said.

I remind myself that i still have a little one. His toys still clutter our house and most especially our bed.  I tell myself i still have a couple of years of having him all to myself. But i know that is really not true. At some point i will have to start letting go. Much earlier than how it was with his sister.

It is different with a son.

I remember there is this shirt which he personally picked out from a rack while we were shopping for school stuff last year. The shirt has a big print out of ” I love Mom” in the front. Now he doesn’t want to wear it in school anymore and says that he is reserving it for family trips. He is trying not to hurt my feelings. I smile and let him know that i understand.

He is growing up too and there is nothing i can do about it.

Except remember the baby that he was and love him over and over again.

He is still sleeping and i take a long time just staring at him. I tell him, “Don’t grow up too fast darling. Mommy misses her baby”.










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